The Hall of Fame? Really?

Dear Ms. Kelly,

I have to confess that I spent a considerable amount of time trying to write "my story," as it pertains to my Bishop Ready High School Hall of Fame nomination. Like many, I have a difficult time with this type of notoriety as I just consider what I do…well, what I do. With that said, what follows is just a summary, rather than some dressed-up version. I don't know how to do that.

I have 3 daughters. That’s not what I say when folks ask because it’s awkward and uncomfortable for them sometimes. Running The MJB Foundation is my way of keeping alive the legacy of my daughter Meghan Joy. This isn’t the life’s work I would have guessed for myself, but it is a mission I embrace, a position I am proud to hold. I’m Meghan Joy’s Daddy, but I’m also very proud of Kailey and Delaney. Being there for all of my children, in whatever capacity, is my biggest priority.

Coming out of Bishop Ready I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life except that it would be better if it didn't involve math. Naturally then, I became a theatre major at The Ohio State University. I thought that was it, the career for me. I even came back and directed a couple of plays at Ready. At the end of the academic year I realized that I wasn't ready for college in the traditional sense. I auditioned and was accepted to the American Musical and Dramatic Academy in New York, but having spent more than $600 in less than 2 days there, and not having received a scholarship I decided instead to continue to work at the library, a job I'd had since my senior year of high school. 

In 1988, I met the woman who would later become my wife. I still didn't know what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I knew that I wanted to be the best husband and father I could possibly be. I think childhood and adolescence is absolutely the hardest thing any of us will have to deal with in our lives (save for extraordinary circumstances), and I knew I wanted to make it as easy as I possibly could for my children.

In 1993, our twin daughters Kailey and Meghan Joy were born. We were not expecting twins, and there were many complications. The whole story is here. 
http://www.mjbfoundation.org/about-the-mjb-foundation/the-story-of-meghan-joy/

In May of 1994, we were devastated by the death of Meghan Joy. In an attempt to find some peace, some reason, my wife and I began to reach out to friends and family who told us that Meghan had inspired them, that she had a profound effect on their lives and many others. To continue her memory and preserve her legacy we started holding a golf tournament every year as we, and many of our friends, were avid golfers. Each year for 9 years we had the golf outing and a big party dubbed "The MJB" to celebrate Meghan's life. We settled into a pattern, and daughter Delaney joined us in 1996.

In 2004, our 10th year, we wanted to do something big. In talking to a friend I realized that we could do more with the story of Meghan, that we should use her inspiration to help other children. Children who, like Meghan faced more than their fair share of challenges. Cerebral palsy, autism and a whole host of other diagnoses affect the daily lives of so many children, and the resources for helping them are few and far between. So began The MJB Foundation.

We held our first Golf for Joy, the 10th annual family golf tournament and party remembering Meghan's inspiration in June of 2004. We raised a little over $1,800. We gained our 501(c) 3 status in 2005. We never looked back. In 2010 we added a bowling event and, to date, we have raised more than $40,000 for children with challenges in Central Ohio. From our Mission Statement: By sponsoring recreational and educational activities, donating physical goods and services, and making monetary contributions we hope to bring Joy to these children. 

When we started The MJB Foundation it was easy to identify a need that wasn’t being met. Simply put, some children just don’t have access, or enough access, as the case may be. When Meghan was born in 1993 we had excellent insurance, everything was paid for. If we needed equipment or some adaptive device for Meghan, no matter the cost, it was covered. In 2004 this type of insurance for anyone was nothing more than a faded memory, and the situation has not improved today. 

Even the children with the most challenges are often left at the bottom of some bureaucratic list with not enough funding to obtain the resources they need to just be kids, to experience the Joy that should be childhood. 

The MJB Foundation wants to be there to fill those gaps, to find those children who aren’t experiencing that Joy and help them with the resources they need. Whether that is an adaptive tricycle, some kind of therapy, a special tray or just an adaptive piece of furniture; we work with organizations like FCBDD to identify children in need, provide the needed funding and send them a gift of Joy from The MJB Foundation. 

Our next event is coming up in November as we are presenting Ohio Idols for Independence – Helping Kids with Cerebral Palsy Find Their Voice in conjunction with Ohio Idol, and CP Parent Columbus, a Family Resource Group for Cerebral Palsy. Attendance is expected to exceed 1,500 and the event should raise more than any other we have held to date. 

So does that make me a Hall of Fame inductee? I don't know. Even when I eventually graduated from college in 2001 I wasn't sure what I wanted to be when I grow up, but I have found that I really like to work with kids, and I really like to work with non-profits, particularly organizations that benefit folks who get missed. My community is very important to me... with a lot of emphasis on family. I’m also currently the treasurer for the Westland Band Boosters. (I had some spare time I needed to fill.)

I told my girls that they didn't come with an instruction manual and that we were going to figure out the best way to do things together. As my children have grown I have stressed to them, and to their friends and other youth I have worked with, the importance of finding a way to enjoy their childhood. 

I coached my girls’ sports teams when they played, and I have been fortunate to be a "second Dad" to many of their friends. I still have kids today whose eyes light up as they greet me with an embrace. Many of them call me "Poppa Chow." That's enough of a reward for me.

With all due respect to teachers...

As I'm sure most everyone is aware, I love to train. I love to teach. I love to coach.

A friend recently asked me why I didn't become a teacher. "You'd be really good at it," she said.

I looked her square in the eye, and I said: "No, I would really suck at it and I'll tell you why. I couldn't lie to kids and tell them that what they were going to learn was going to prove to be useful in their life experience."

Now, I'm not saying that the three R's aren't key to being a good citizen, but when push comes to shove... Well, be honest how much of what you learned in your later years in school do you really use everyday, or even most days?

That's what I thought.

The truth is that kids don't really learn how to live in the classroom. They learn it on the playing field. They learn it on the stage, and in the arena. They learn it by just living and experiencing everything.

To deny that, at least from my perspective is to deny the obvious.

Recently, our local school district's decision makers, (you'll note I did not say leaders) decided to take that opportunity for learning away from our children, or at least put it in jeopardy so it was eventually taken away.

The deal went something like this. Vote FOR the levy, (that did not pass in the fall) to continue to support our bloated budget and lack of fiscal responsibility, (admittedly exacerbated by the current economy) or we will take all extracurricular activities away from your children.

No, I'm not kidding.

"Pay to play?" you ask. Not an option.

This is the same school district that, when they didn't pass their last levy decided to go to split sessions.

Fortunately, our girls were in Catholic schools at the time and unaffected.

Still, I'm here to tell you, nothing will make a voter change their mind more quickly in the voting booth than watching a kid get off the bus sometime between 6:00 and 8:00 at night...

on Halloween.

Again, not kidding.

So this time, though our feet were again put to the fire - as you may have guessed our district did not pass the levy. The nays took the vote at 56%.

Of course, although I felt pressured to do so, we voted FOR the levy as it directly impacted our children.

I'm not sure what exactly to make of the folks who voted "No." While I understand that they are tired of paying more taxes, I can't help but wonder what they think will happen to their property values.

I'd venture a guess that the amount lost in property value is much greater than the comparatively small amount of extra tax money that would have been paid.

Can you imagine trying to sell a home in a school district where the doors to the school close at 4:00 and don't open until the next morning?

You read that right. Absolutely no activities. You name it, that after school program has been nixed.

I found out last week that drama, choir, and band, i.e. the activities my kids are involved in are part of the regular curriculum - so my girls will not lose the ability to learn those things.

But they will miss out on the opportunity to learn the things that come with those things, the true reward of the Friday night performance, the joy of hearing the crowd cheer for your effort. The things that make kids work harder, try harder, learn more to come back and experience again...

Gone. Buh bye!

Oh, they say they'll have "in school performances," but I'm not holding my breath to see how those turn out, or how many parents, and family members will be able to take the time off from work, (you know - where they earn the money to pay those taxes) to attend.

Of course it goes without saying that my heart goes out to those athletes who cannot perform "in school," including my former neighbor a sophomore next year, and a pretty darn good quarterback by all accounts.

How good? Well, let's just say a former OSU quarterback just spent some time with him, and discussions were under way to work together during the summer.

"The extra time, the extra mile, working toward a greater reward, learning about being a responsible member of a team, finding confidence when you may not have in the classroom..."

Gone. Buh bye!

The final irony here is that our kids have been told from the day they entered junior high, and high school that involvement in these same activities that are now being taken away from them were to have been key to their continued academic success and advancement. How are our children supposed to process the loss of that key?

So what now?

Word on the street is that we'll have a special election in August to try and pass this levy again. I will be there voting yes, but I wonder if the district really thinks they're going to change that many minds.

Are they just trying to teach us a lesson? I wonder what that might be?

I do know this; when you take the vote, a treasured American institution, and make a mockery of it with the threats, and the bullying...

Well, I feel like all my kids are learning is that the bully wins.

The "Gift" of Technology

Technology is a great thing. Heck, without technology I wouldn't have the job I have today. People need it. People need to learn how to use it. People need to be able to fix it without feeling intimidated.

So it is that I am able to come to work each day, or sometimes even go home at night, or to my in-laws, or to a friends, a poker game, to see the baker, the banker, and the cabinet maker and feel valued. (Okay, maybe those last three were a bit of a stretch.)

"Computer guys" or "Tech-Geeks," as we have been known to tag ourselves, do sometimes get together and commiserate (WOTD yesterday) about how it would be nice to just once go someplace and not talk tech, but secretly I think we, at least I, kind of like it that we are often asked for an opinion or a fix (not that kind of fix), or for just some time to look at something that has gone awry.

Lately though I haven't been offering many opinions, or providing many fixes, at least not in the regular sense.

Ordinarily folks who ask me questions need tweaks, tips, tricks and such - They need solutions that aren't obvious to everyone.

The folks I've been helping the most lately - For them just knowing how to use a computer is their solution, and maybe their salvation.

As you know if you are a regular follower (Thank you), or may not know if you are not (Welcome), the library where I work began this year to offer Job Help Centers to folks who need help finding and applying for jobs.

Now, I've been an on and off job hunter for the last 7-8 years since I got my degree in 2001. I've been working on career paths, resumes and the like for most of the last 10-11 or since I had to become our resume software expert when I came to work in the Main Library Media Center in 1998.

If you need to know about WinWay Resume, I'm your man. If you want to use the resume templates provided by Microsoft, you're on your own. But I digress.

Alright, so where are you going with this Jimmer?

Well I'll tell you...

Since diving into the job search effort with a new verve, and a sense of urgency as opposed to just dabbling along the way - I have learned something very important.

Finding a job is a DAMNED hard thing to do.

Every application is online, they are all different, and sometimes pretty darn long. Additionally almost all assume a certain computer knowledge level regardless of the job one is applying for.

"Want to work in Environmental Services (or just clean things), please upload your resume here:"

Never mind that you will most likely never touch a computer again in your time of employment with that company.

And it's not just employers or even the job sites:

Care to collect unemployment?

Well, we realize you're 60+ years old and have never used anything more technical than your television remote, but you've just been laid off from the job you thought you'd retire from and to get any money? Well, welcome to the online world.

Don't have email?

Sorry - that's required.

Oh, you can do it the old fashioned way - there is a toll free number. Be sure to pack a lunch, and dinner, and maybe even the next day's breakfast - Yes, you might be on hold that long.

Yep. Computers are a huge part of the employment world, and something all too many of us take for granted.

I've told many funny stories over the years about customers who thought: "You Have Performed An Illegal Operation" meant the police were coming to their house; or those that swore up and down their keyboard was broken until I showed them "NumLock;" and even my favorite about the gentleman who looked me square in the eye and said:

"I ain't no computer savage Jim!"

Those were all funny and timely, but alternatives still existed and the learning curve for all of us was a little bit more forgiving.

Those aren't the times we are in now. It's not funny now. It's a little more real - for all of us.

So next time you sit down at your keyboard and bring up The Life of Jimmer, or login to Facebook, or Twitter, or calmly sort through your pages upon pages of email - consider that there is somebody out there who lacks that knowledge, lacks that access.

Take a moment to consider what that might mean, and how fortunate we all really are.

Hey, I never said I'd never preach, but I do invite you to make the comment section your pulpit if you'd like to share your thoughts on the rampant rise of technology.

Dreams?

Do you ever try and figure out your dreams?

I don't have dreams very often, but when I do they are always and without fail - weird.

Last night, well this morning (I didn't actually fall asleep until about 5 a.m.) I dreamed that I was a coach at my parish, (not that odd) my house was flooded from a faulty roof, (we just got a new roof in November) and this made my Dad angry, (No idea, he hasn't been to my house in over a year).

I got into trouble for yelling at a player and making her cry. (I don't recall having ever yelled at a player to the point where they were even remotely close to crying.) I also calmed said player so well during the course of a ball game she was pitching, (just by taking the ball from her for a minute and looking at her with my "calm down" look) that she won the game and we were both heroes. A major league scout came and said I was totally "in control" of the game and she would definitely want me to run a game for her team (although I haven't been a head coach since K was 7.)

The win and the scout saved me at my trial with the lady in charge of the school, (my high school chemistry teacher?) who allowed me to keep my coaching job once I correctly identified the first commandment, although my father had missed on the eighth.

I was however to remain contrite.

Okay - what the heck does this dream mean? It's been bugging me all morning.

What do you want to be when you grow up?

What do you want to be when you grow up?

This time honored question keeps popping into my head today. Yes another thing stuck in my head. Only this time it's not a fun lyric or word. It's not even a movie line which seems to be this week's newest thing. (Good thing there's plenty of room in my head I guess.)

No, this thing, this question is different. We've all heard this question. We've all asked this question.

I am wondering how many of us have answered this question.

I know that we are all something. We have occupations, families, activities, etc... So, in taking the question a step further - I guess I'm wondering if we all are "what we want to be?"

I know there are a few fortunate souls in this world who knew from the jump what they wanted to be, what they wanted to do, and they are blazin' down the trail of success.

Others may not have known when they were younger but discovered something in themselves as they grew older and seized the very first opportunity to make life happen as it were.

Still others were guided along, shown all the things they "should" be doing as they grew up, and maybe are now what they want to be. Perhaps this is some version of happenstance, (Blog word of the week?) or just plain dumb luck.

They say that luck isn't everything, that some skill is required and I believe that, but still I wonder...

As you may have guessed, I'm not one of those mentioned above - I never really knew what I wanted to be when I grew up.

I always had an answer to the question of course. I was going to be a professional hockey player, or play pro ball, maybe even spend some time on the PBA Tour, all the while running some fantastically successful business like a hotel or maybe a chain of hotels.

When I got older I wanted to be an actor, then a comedian, maybe a writer - you know much more realistic goals like that. Sigh!

Before I go further - I want to address all you head shakers. You know who you are. You're the ones thinking, or maybe even saying out loud: "But Jim you've accomplished so much. You have blah, blah, blah..."

Shhh... That's not what I'm talking about today

Yes, I've spent the last 18 years being a husband, the last 15 being a Daddy, the last 8 or more being a coach, and the last 12 being a hockey player, but not a professional hockey player - that's cruel.

Still it's very true that these are all things I want to be. I've had great success, and been fortunate in these areas and I hope to continue to enjoy these very important areas of my life.

These aren't the things I'm talking about today. To clarify further, I'm talking about jobs and careers.

I started working for the library when I was 17 years old. It was a clean building. I loved reading. The work albeit a bit tedious was not really that difficult. It was not Jolly Pirate Donuts where I had been a porter for 1 1/2 years prior. I figured the library was a great starting point for a kid in high school. Perhaps most importantly I found and got the job all by myself. It was the first truly independent thing I had ever done.

I love the library and all that it is, all that it stands for. I love the people I work with and I feel especially fortunate we have had the opportunity recently to reach out and really get to know each other more and more.

As I've written before, I consider that connection to be a huge success for the CML community.

Going forward however - I'm trying to figure out what that success means for me.

I wrote to my Dad some years ago that with no degree or formal training I had somehow managed to make a career for myself at a place where I was mostly happy and decidedly, perhaps even too content.

I still didn't figure the library might be the only place I would ever work.

The truth is I wasn't what I wanted to be then.

From a career perspective - without knowing it really I had no goals, no dreams, no visions beyond the day to day. I had no plan. (You see K and D why I talk about having a plan?)

Some of that came from being happy being a husband, Daddy, coach, hockey player, but not a professional hockey player - that's cruel. Some of it came from not really knowing how - being afraid as it were to venture away from the safety and security of the library.

Now?

Now I don't want to leave, but not because I'm afraid.

I want to stay because I have found something that is telling me who I am, who - no what I want to be.

I started work on a program this week to create a Job Help Class for the library to offer customers in these rough economic times.

I cannot tell you how ironic this is as I have already been hard at work on my own resume, online job profiles, and career prospects.

If you follow this blog with any regularity you know that I love to train, to teach, and to coach. You know how much I have come to admire the rock stars of the Web 2.0 world, and even how I might want their jobs one day.

I have been busy thinking of ways to stay at the library, but increase my involvement in social media and marketing, to reach out, help people, and share my experience for others to learn from. I have been searching for a focus for my life, my career, heck even for my blog.

I think being fortunate enough to help in the creation and delivery of this Job Help Class provides me with that focus, a starting point for helping me be what I want to be when I grow up.

In taking inventory I find that I have almost 11 years experience teaching folks to build their resumes. For better or worse I also have 8 years experience poking around the job markets, learning all the sites, the ins, and the outs.

Pretty much every other week for the last year I have been teaching a resume class, and as my boss will tell you, I've been looking for a way to make my class so much more effective.

I have at least 8 years of experience as a coach, and let's not forget 15 years as a parent.

In this year of reflection I have come to find that what I enjoy most is sharing what I have learned with anyone who will listen.

I suggested to a friend today that maybe throwing all of this together might make me a good "life coach."

He said that "would be a good fit." I trust his opinion. He knows me well. What that's called formally, or how it will look in the future is open to interpretation. That's okay with Jim in Perpetual Beta.

I'm sure my daughters, and my players will tell you that my favorite saying in all the land goes like this.

"This ain't my first rodeo dog."

So now, I have a plan, and at least starting out I am lucky enough to stay at the library, as I begin.

Do you think somewhere there is someone, someone who knows me really well, or a mentor, or maybe even someone who has had a great influence on my life smiling and thinking to themselves.

"Hey Jimmer. This ain't my first rodeo dog."

Stay blue... or Go Bucks!

I'm wearing an Ohio State sweatshirt today, and if you know me you know that's a bit of an anomaly.

Having spent the better part of my first decade growing up in Michigan I naturally grew up a fan of the Michigan Wolverines or as the great Bob Ufer would say the Meeechigan Wolverines! I say naturally because it would be considered fairly unnatural to grow up rooting for Michigan State. Just kidding Juice. ;-)

In all seriousness though, the UM vs. MSU rivalry was the one that was emphasized most in my house when we lived in Michigan. This is not to say we weren't cognizant of the OSU rivalry, it just wasn't as upfront and personal for us.

Then we moved to Lima, Ohio. Suddenly, not only was the rivalry personal it was a whole lot more heated. Picking a Michigan and / or Michigan State team in Michigan seemed like Potayto / Potahto compared to picking a Michigan team in Ohio.

I understand this now, but back then I remember both my Dad and I being more than a little bewildered. It seemed my whole classroom wanted to alternately beat me and / or entice me into betting on the game so they could mock me if I lost. I remember many Sunday evenings scraping together pennies so I could pay off those debts.

Ah, would that pennies to pay off debts would be enough these days. Sigh!

Oh, sorry - back to our tale.

My family and I toughened up, stood our ground and supported our team through thick and thin. As I grew up, the heated rivalry could still be heated for us, but gradually grew into just friendly banter among friends even when we moved to Columbus.

My Mother did take her life into her own hands one evening while attending OSU. Wearing a Michigan snow cap to keep herself warm as she walked across campus she was confronted by an angry student. Fortunately, she held her ground and the student relented.

I met and married my wonderful wife Annette, herself an OSU grad, who let my U of M short comings fall by the wayside and decided I was okay after all.

We attended THE GAME in 1994 heretofore my first and only live OSU vs. UM game. We were each clad in gear supporting our teams, and the fans in the stadium were all great sports, (save one drunk who was quickly guided away by more good sports) and we had a great time. Of course OSU won that game, probably the greatest win of John Cooper's career so everyone was in a great mood. Oddly enough, even I was in a pretty good mood.

In 1995, for a number of reasons I decided to return to school and finally get my college degree. Unfortunately, I faced a bit of a quandry. While I have a great deal of respect for colleges like Columbus State, Franklin University, Ohio Dominican, Capital et al. I wanted to get my degree from a "big school." I had grown up dreaming of going to Michigan, made three campus visits to Notre Dame, seriously considered going to Penn State and finally ended up at OSU the first time around because it was the simplest thing to do. This time I chose to go to Ohio State.

I reasoned that it was okay to attend college at "my team's" top rival university since it was my only big school option. I had begun to root for the Buckeyes when they weren't playing Michigan in football, and especially when they were playing Michigan in basketball. (Fab Five - best team money can buy eh?) So, it would be all good right?

I saw Archie Griffin on campus, and ran after him like a little boy asking for his autograph - on my notebook.

I also pulled a stunt not unlike my mother, forgetting one day that I had worn a Michigan windbreaker to work and deciding to wear it to class and take the heat rather than leave it in my car where it would surely be stolen or damaged, or worse yet my car might be damaged. Strangely enough, I enjoyed a number of friendly exchanges with students who chided me about Michigan's loss that year to Northwestern. It was all good, I thought.

Then the Buckeyes took an undefeated record into Michigan Stadium riding high off a one game winning streak in THE GAME. Of course the Bucks promptly made Tshimanga "Tim" Biakabutuka a first round draft pick on their way to being upset by the Wolverines.

The mood on campus was never the same again. Needless to say, I didn't forget and wear the wrong jacket anymore.

Instead I continued on toward my degree, graduating in March of 2001. At this time a friend gave me a book he said was required reading for all true Buckeyes. 101 reasons to hate Michigan or some such thing. So, I read it. It was funny. Ha Ha...

What the friend didn't know was that after that Buckeye loss in 1995, and the resulting angst of their loyal fans I had seriously begun to question my allegiance to the Wolverines.

While Buckeyes and their fans were up in arms about the loss to the Maize and Blue, the Michigan team and fans did not seem to feel the same degree of urgency to win them all.

I have all the respect in the world for the legend that is Bo Schembechler. Still it had always eaten at me that his teams, and then Gary Moeller's teams, and especially Lloyd Carr's teams again and again lost games that they should have won, classically underachieving for their talent level. I understand that losing happens, but mediocrity seemed to be the rule rather than the exception, particularly under the last of the "Michigan Men," as it were.

I know, I know - Lloyd Carr won a National Championship in 1997. I have the commemorative hat on a shelf above my desk, but what many don't know is that on the evening of that victory I opened a bottle of champagne, poured a glass for my father and myself, took a celebratory drink, and put down my glass with this immediate thought - "Because of this championship we will be stuck with this man until the day he decides to retire." I was not happy.

But I remained a Michigan fan.

In 1998 the Wolverines lost their first two games. Still I remained a Michigan fan.

Lloyd Carr made a mockery of the college careers of both Tom Brady and Drew Henson.

I remained a Michigan fan.

2000 3 losses, 2001 4 losses, 2002 3 losses including a loss to the Buckeyes sending them to the National Championship game.

This was a culmination of a season that had seen me watch the Buckeyes with so many close friends each and every week. Heck, I knew the Buckeye roster better than Michigan's.

I celebrated the Buckeyes' success with my friends, and rooted hard for them in the National Championship game against Miami. I cried in victory when they won.

I remained a Michigan fan.

I had actually heard after that year's GAME that many respected me for continuing to root for my childhood team, and sticking to my guns, showing up at a party of hundreds with the only Wolverine jersey in the bunch. Oh, if they could have known how conflicted my heart was becoming.

2003 I attend my first game in Michigan Stadium. The Wolverines win an important game against Purdue and I am seemingly the only person in the Stadium who cheers the victory. Seriously, 111,349 in attendance and I felt like the only one celebrating. Michigan also wins the GAME - I couldn't celebrate. I felt sorry for my heartbroken friends.

But I remained a Michigan fan.

2004 3 losses dropping games to Notre Dame, Ohio State, and Texas, the last being one of the best college football games I have ever seen.

I remained a Michigan fan.

Of course 2004 also marked the beginning of the college career of one Mike Hart. More on this later.

2005 - 5 losses, 2006 2 losses - the last two games of the season. Could a heart take much more?

Or would that be a Hart? I don't believe Mike Hart has any heart. I don't believe he is a leader. I don't believe he is a player who cares. (I also don't generally attack the character of college athletes unless they run their mouths and open themselves to scrutiny.)

2007 - Appalachian State - Need I say more? Mike Hart by all accounts did not play the better part of the 2nd and 3rd quarters because he was "dinged up." When he finally did play and score a touchdown to put his team back in the hunt, he promptly jogged to the sideline rather than stay out for the two point conversion. A leader? After the game he said his head was held high, better in the first game, than the second, blah, blah, blah....

Coach Carr - why are you letting players talk after that game? Why are you...?

You know what?!? Never mind. I'm done.

No longer a Michigan fan.

Tucked away in closets, I have my windbreaker, a jersey, a hat or two. Tucked away in my heart I have the memories from my childhood.

I wish Rich Rodriguez and the Wolverines nothing but the best - but my heart won't be yours to break, my pride won't be on the line for your program every weekend I live in Columbus.

To date, RR I've seen nothing to warrant my return.

Besides I am now a proud Buckeye. I've lived in Ohio longer. I graduated from The Ohio State University. I have nothing but respect for Jim Tressel, the man he is, the young men he molds, and the emphasis on excellence he places in every aspect of his work, and in the goals and pursuits of his teams.

Tomorrow, I will be attending a party with my friends, proudly wearing the same Buckeye garb as they do.

I can't pretend to harbor the same hatred for the team up North that some may have.

But, I will not continue to be disappointed by a team that seemingly cannot understand one basic concept.

In life and on the field, we all have our struggles, we all have our successes, we all have our highs and lows. It's what we do with them that really counts.

Will we strive for perfection or will we forget what the Michigan program does not seem to get?

Mediocrity is not acceptable.

10 Random Things About Me - Learn & Play @ CML Bonus

1. I obtained our family's first iPod for the grand total of $1.00 + the cost of gas to go pick it up. I won it in a church raffle with a ticket I only bought because all of the parents around me at the basketball game were buying tickets. My daughter Delaney still uses theiPod, except when it "white screens" which we haven't been able to fix permanently for some reason.

2. Though I have played almost 12 years of organized hockey as an adult, I only played one year as a kid. When I was 8 I skated for "Warner-CantrellPadmos" or the Blackhawks as we called ourselves, in Redford Township, Michigan. I was very green, and also very good. But, I had a heart condition. Nothing major, but enough of a concern that my ice-time needed to be monitored. As do many youth coaches, mine wanted to put his best players on the ice as much as possible. As the season progressed each time I was due to come off the ice my coach would ask more and more if I was alright to stay out. Of course I always answered yes. I was a kid, I didn't understand the consequences of overexerting myself and I wanted to play. The last straw came when my coach left me out for so long I was finally met at the door to the bench by my Dad who physically removed me from the ice. When the season was over so was my youth hockey career. I wanted to play goalie, but I think my Dad knew that was a ruse just to get myself onto the ice by hook or by crook. I was disappointed and decided to hang out at all the summer camps my friends were attending. I don't know why - just to watch and make myself more miserable I guess. I was pleasantly surprised when the scouts and coaches running those camps told me how disappointed they were I wasn't on the ice for more development. They had seen me play and wanted to work with me. I don't believe I ever told my parents this, and I don't talk about it much, but it's fun now to think about what might have been. I did talk myself into one of the post-camp games and scored a goal laying on my back. I hung onto that memory for a long time until I was fortunate enough to finally play again thanks to Joe at Hilltop who pulled me back to the game with late night pick-up at OSU. Thanks Joe.

3. My first major at OSU was Theatre. I was going to be an actor, (Plus I didn't want to take math.) The pic I used for my read poster was actually a resume photo. After my first year at OSU, I went to New York and auditioned at The American Academy of Dramatic Arts. I was accepted, but didn't get the scholarship I needed. I knew I didn't want to go back to school atOSU, at least not then so I went full-time at CML and the rest is history.

4. During my time at OSU as a Theatre major I returned to my high school, Bishop Ready and directed both the fall play and spring musical. I got a little thank you of $100 each time. I guess I could say I've worked "professionally in the theatre." Wonder if I should add that to my resume? ;-)

5. As a child I would spend many late nights listening to my mother clean to the music of Judy Garland, Barbra Streisand, Barry Manilow, Helen Reddy, Neil Diamond, and Abba. Consequently I know many lyrics to a lot of songs I wasn't sure at first I was happy to know. Growing up however I've become more and more comfortable with my "Inner Gay" as my friend Shoebrarian calls it, and I'm happy to know and love the work of these amazing performers.

6. My favorite movie is "Prince of Tides," but that's not the only "chick flick" I like. A close second on the list is "50 First Dates." What can I say? I'm a sucker for love stories.

7. I have a talent for remembering numbers. I can tell you my first credit card number, my original library card number, the first phone number I had to remember, and every jersey number I've ever worn. I can associate almost any number with an athlete pretty much immediately.

8. When getting dressed I always put on the left first, i.e. left sock, left shoe, left glove, left skate. I once got dressed for a baseball game, jumped on my bike to go play and realized I had put my right sock on first. So, I made my buddy wait while I went in - undressed and redressed. I went 2-3 and raised my average to .571. I've never chanced it again. I actually think I'm naturally left handed as I can do just about anything with my left hand without much trouble. Playing hockey - I still shoot left handed.

9. I've been a part of two branch moves in my time at CML. I worked to move Morse Road to Karl Road and to combine Hilltop and Hilltonia into the new Hilltop. (This was my second tour of duty at Hilltop, and I still consider it my CML home if you will.) Branch moves can be great team builders, and a lot of fun for everybody involved. I don't think I've ever worked harder though. :-0

10. Here's my favorite library story - I met my wife Annette at Morse Road Library. When she walked into the staff room on her first day I said to my boss, "that newLTA is hot." He just rolled his eyes at me. Little did we know. A few weeks later Annette and I went to lunch together at Mother's, (we still have a matchbook) and a few months after that - after we both got engaged to and broke up with other people - we moved in together having never gone out on a date. We both just knew we were meant to be together. More than 18 years later, I still wonder how I ever got so lucky.

Whole New Rodeo Dog - Thing #23.

Alright Gang - I'm going to try to do this one with a little structure, but include some story too.

I'll try to use the suggested questions as a framework.

What were your favorite discoveries or exercises on this learning journey?

There are two answers here: Obviously my favorite and still continued exercise is Twitter.

My favorite discovery has actually been rediscovering my love of writing through my blog. I am so grateful for this. In short it has been therapeutic and life-changing. In the last few months I can even tell when I haven't been blogging as much as I need to as I felt my anxiety level rising.

The blog allows me to remind myself to be Jimmer, i.e. the real me. I've tried to be sure not to make Jimmer a character, to not talk about myself in the third person, except for maybe when it was appropriate for a piece. This is not a character by any stretch. This is Jim Brochowski about as exposed and open as I've ever been, reaching out, reflecting, trying to give myself another chance by simply being myself.

Two recent examples make me think I'm on the right track.

The first is a situation wherein I was pretty much asked to prove that this wasn't all just lip-service. I believe the reviewer is convinced.

The second is a comment from a friend at CML. She told me I could quote her.

Jim-
I have loved following you on Twitter. Like I said in a recent tweet, your willingness to self reflect and share that process has been heartwarming. As we all reveal a part of ourselves through social networking, new relationships are being created and others are being rekindled. It is so cool to watch it and experience it. Of course my follow-up tweet said this, “Now you have become more than just the guy who drinks coffee all day.” I’m sure you understood why I said this. The only time you and I had ever had any interaction is when you passed by the Greeter Desk on the way to the Java Master, coffee cup in hand. We are communicating on a whole different level now, and I think it is great. Looking forward to the continuing conversation…..

That means a lot more than I think I can verbalize. Thank you Type A Librarian.

How has this program assisted or affected your lifelong learning goals?

My lifelong learning goals all relate back to 3 things. Three discoveries I've made about myself in the last few months / years. These are my base.

Because the 23 Things for me has been so much more than just Learn & Play, I think it is obvious that this program has been more than just those things. It has provided an avenue to learning, a way to reconnect and show people who the real Jimmer is.

So, what are the three things you ask?

The first thing - a customer came into the library to print something out. He had no idea whatsoever what he was doing so what he ended up doing was taking it out on our staff. Cussing up a storm, swinging his arms, banging the equipment and not getting what he needed in the process.

I don't know how or why, but something struck me. I was never more calm as I said to him - "It's okay. What do you need?" Looking puzzled he stared at me and said "Huh?" I repeated what I had said and he told me what he wanted. Together, we accomplished his task in a little less than five minutes. That was weird I thought, but I didn't really understand the magnitude of the situation until I received a copy of a note / "say it" the customer had left commending me for being helpful while he was "irate."

Reflecting on this I realized that what I had done was recognize that this man's true intent was not to create a disturbance. He simply needed to accomplish something he had no idea how to accomplish. Huh?

True intent.

I began to think long and hard about how I was interacting with people. Was I recognizing what their true intent was when they came to me with a question for example? Was my Mother's true intent really to frustrate me every time she visited?

Wait - My Mother - Oh the poor woman. I really needed to work on this when interacting with her.

So, I set two goals for myself, and made them my New Year's resolution and Lenten promise until the end of time. 1. Be nice to my mother and do everything in my power to make her feel welcome in my home. 2. Always try to consider peoples' true intent when interacting with them and respond accordingly and without bias.

Note: As far as I can tell - True Intent in this context is my own thing. I don't think there's any great concept out there. Hmmm... Maybe I should write a book or something. "True Intent" copyright 2008 Jim Brochowski ;-)

The second thing - When I tell the story of Meghan Joy I always include the following quote:

"From Meghan and because of Meghan we learned to attack each day with enthusiasm. We learned to reach out and make things happen for us instead of waiting for them to happen to us. We learned to face each new challenge head on, with our entire being. We now know the value of living and giving a total effort. Many years ago I lost my daughter. As I look back on her story and what effect it has had on our lives I see that I’ve tried to live my life from that point exactly as I’d promised Meghan I would. I guess it sounds like a cliché, but life is short."

It's almost like a prepared text pulled from the pages of her story, but when I saw it in print at our golf tournament this year it was abundantly clear that I was not keeping my promise. I began to do some deep soul-searching, looking at the man in the mirror as they say and trying to find better ways to change.

The third and final thing. This one I owe to Randy Pausch. In his final lecture he talked about, among other things being a Tigger or being an Eeyore, i.e. an optimist or a pessimist. He also talked about how he had lived his life, doing things for his kids, and his wife. It is an incredible lecture. If you haven't watched it I assure you it is an investment of your time you will not regret. He also wrote a book titled "The Last Lecture" which I highly recommend.

I really admired Randy's viewpoint, but I didn't know how valuable it would be to me personally until my daughter Delaney started school this year. Delaney was a worrier, the "what if" person if you will and I was having a hard time convincing her that it would be good to go into school with a positive attitude, charging ahead, being a leader and so on. But she wasn't getting it. Finally, I looked at Delaney and remembering Randy's lecture I said; "Are you Eeyore? Or are you Tigger?" Instantly her eyes lit up. She got it. She really got it, and she now tries to be a Tigger in every way.

Having had this talk with my daughter I knew I needed to ask myself the same question. Jim, are you a Tigger or are you an Eeyore? Yes, I needed to change my answer too.

These three things are my base. I try to check myself regularly on these, and I encourage you to check me as well. Go on. I'll listen. ;-)

Were there any take-aways or unexpected outcomes from this program that surprised you?

I have been pleasantly surprised by the sense of community that has been created at CML. This exists throughout the Web 2.0 community. I have been able to reconnect with my colleagues at the library in several locations, and I have made new connections via Facebook, and by following the "rock stars" blogs.

I think my new career goal might be to be one of those rock stars. Look out Michael Stephens. Kidding ;-)

Seriously, this program has provided me a way to reflect by moving forward. For that I will always be grateful.

What could we do differently to improve upon this program’s format or concept?

My old self would have said something really badass, like: "Don't you dare change a thing about this program." But that's not me anymore.

I think what I would say now is don't ever forget the term "Perpetual Beta." Please always be willing to consider the next idea, the next thing and embrace them. Try them even if they don't initially seem to be so great, even if they require radical trust, even if the benefits aren't immediately obvious.

I believe there are so many organizations, companies, and even industries that are being held up by their reluctance to change and adapt, to try new things even.

I think my biggest pet peeve right now is people who say; "I don't have time for all that Web 2.0 stuff, that new fangled techno stuff and so on. I've got real work to do." I wonder if they have ever considered how much more work they could get done if they would get on board and let that new fangled techno stuff work for them.

I'm trying to bring Web 2.0 technologies to my foundation with a new board later this month. I am very hopeful they will agree with me on this. I think The MJB Foundation can accomplish so much. Please wish us luck.

Oh and consider this your formal invitation to follow The MJB Foundation on Twitter. (Updates should become more frequent soon.)

If we offered another discovery program like this in the future, would you again choose to participate?

This one is simple and requires only a few words - in a heartbeat.

One more you didn't ask:

What has been the coolest thing about this program?

As a teacher, trainer, and a coach the coolest thing for me are the "Aha moments," when you can see folks really get it, When they are really connecting and helping themselves succeed. When they are engaged. I've been fortunate enough to see more than my fair share of these over the years and Learn & Play provided that many more. My favorite saying in these instances is "this ain't my first rodeo dog."

Of course this rodeo has been quite a bit different.

"Coach B"

Call me sexist, old fashioned whatever you'd like, but when my wife and I were blessed with daughters who are definitely my princesses - well I never thought I would end up being a coach. I mean, I don't know anything about dancing, or cheerleading, or drill team, or... you get the picture.

Well I was wrong. (Yes again - go figure.) When my oldest was 7 she decided she wanted to play baseball in the local coach pitch league which prompted my youngest to want to play t-ball. Who knew? Alright I thought, - we'll watch them play for a year, be as supportive as possible, and assure them at the end of the summer that it's okay if they don't want to play anymore. I told myself I would just stay on the sideline, not be too pushy, you know one of "those parents." Then K's coach decided he could not coach. The team was left abandoned. "Do it Jim. You know you want to," I heard from more than one parent - and they were right. So, I got down on one knee and called the team together - "Hi gang," I said "I'm 'Coach B.'"

-I will forever be grateful for the privilege.

I coached in the coach pitch league for two years, both as a head coach and as an assistant for t-ball. I loved that it was a teaching league. We were in the field with the kids teaching them the game. It was incredible. I could write a book, (To be honest I have one started, though I haven't worked on it in years.) especially about that first year. But that was only the first chapter for "Coach B."

When the girls were done with baseball - I didn't know what might come next. K started volleyball the next fall. I knew she hoped I could help out with that. Eagerly she came to me and said "Daddy, I'm playing volleyball this year. Can you help?" I reached back as far as I could, looked down at my daughter, and gave her this sage advice -

"Don't spill your beer."

Huh?!?

To me, volleyball was a backyard, family gathering, beach, at the pub game, usually played with beer in hand. I didn't know anything about "real volleyball." I explained this to K. She was cool with that. We moved on. Right about then I figured my time as "Coach B" had come to an end.

Basketball season started.
Now I hadn't played much organized basketball but I had coached one year in a rec league in my early 20's. Of course that ended with me getting thrown out of the gym. It's another story, I was perfectly justified, and I would do it again. Still, I didn't really think I was qualified anymore to be a "head basketball coach." As it turned out, I didn't need to be. Another Dad had the job already. When he asked for help at the team meeting - well I was drawn. I'm just fascinated with the game. I wanted to help, and you know be involved with my daughter. I showed up at the gym - Scott asked me to jump in and I became an assistant - which it turns out I liked even better.

I was the assistant for softball too, (Thanks Matt) and many of "my girls" played on those teams as well.

Yes, "my girls." For those five years, and even still today instead of 3 daughters I sometimes had, or have as many as 10 or 11. I love them all.

As it turns out, for "Coach B," (and later sometimes "Mr. B,") coaching isn't about X's and O's. It's about - well I'm not gonna sit here and blow my own horn...

Today's entry was inspired by this story from one of Annette's co-workers. Believe me, it's worth the read... Go on, I'll wait.

I told you.

Last year, I had some idle time on my hands. My girls had all grown up. Then D's coach asked me to help. Since D has a mean jumper that I love to watch up close and personal - I jumped at the chance.

Who am I kidding I just love coaching. The girls have two years left. Who knows? Maybe then I'll have even more daughters.

I feel so lucky to be "Coach B."

Thanks Girls!