Back in the Literary Saddle - as it were.

 Whew - Kinda dusty in these parts... Has it really been 8 1/2 years since I posted? Dems da facts as they say...

So much has happened - where to begin? What shall we talk about? Oh hell... who knows...

Here's what I do know - I've been retired for almost 6 years. One of my retirement goals was to write more. One of many goals... Life has taken many interesting, and not so interesting twists and turns... and well, I haven't written more. Although...

I do write in my head - every day. Not a very useful medium is it? 

Yes, I know how that sounds.

But - I've decided to give it a go, to find a space, to put down some words every day - well every work day anyway, and see if I can find this voice, my voice - again. 

I'm a lot older, a little grumpier, and maybe even a little wiser than the last time I decided to share some thoughts and stories... I feel like now is a good time. I will try not to be too grumpy.

I might stay here. I might move... I'll probably continue to share on Facebook - just because I know there's at least a few folks there who might enjoy what I write. Who knows...

The only thing I'm sure of is this: It is time to write. It's the one thing I have always enjoyed. Good, bad, indifferent. It's not work. It's just what I do. Why not share it... What do you think?

Pray

We heard the sirens during the band booster meeting we were attending. We went to bed fairly certain that once again kids in our community were facing tragedy. We woke this morning to find that was indeed the case, to learn their names, and to know a man had lost his life in the accident.

Netter and the girls usually leave about an  hour before I do in the mornings. They always come in and kiss me goodbye. We tell each other “love you, have a good day, see you later,” and such and then I fall back to sleep grateful I still have that hour or so.

Today that didn’t happen. I could tell as Netter leaned down to kiss me that something was amiss, something was different. So, I asked  her.

“Nothing,” she said: “Well not nothing um, the kids that were in the accident. Well, we know who it was.”

I sat up a little and asked who and she told me their names. I didn’t know any of them personally. One of their parents were friends of friends. I’d done some computer work for them. Dad had played in Golf for Joy one year. Mom and I are Facebook friends. Acquaintances. Still, I could feel it in my gut.

Netter assured me she had talked with the girls and they were okay. We said goodbye with extra emphasis on the “see you later,” (because I believe that makes it so) and I lay back down in bed.

I didn’t fall back asleep this time though. I got up to call Mulligan to help comfort me, and darned if that dog wasn’t standing outside the door waiting for me to let him in. His sensitivity still amazes me. I’ve no idea how he does it.

Mulligan and I laid in bed snuggling, and I dozed a bit, but mostly I just thought of those boys and the accident, of the multitude of things I have done behind the wheel of a car in my lifetime that could have landed me in  jail, or the hospital, or yes, even the morgue, and how many times presently that  I am afraid of driving, afraid I’ve used up all my chances.

I thought about K, who is in the process of taking driving lessons, but not very eager to finish her in car session, and how I might be okay with that... Now.

I thought about D who declared recently that she never wanted to drive and Netter who waited until she was 25 to get her license, and how that might not be such a bad idea for the girls.

Then I rolled over, picked up my phone and read a text I received from our friends of the friends telling me about the boy in the hospital, knowing I would want to know.

I got ready and came to work and went online to read the articles, and watch the slide show and the video about the accident, and unfortunately began reading the comments after those articles.

Apparently only a few of those folks were ever teenagers who ever did anything wrong, and didn’t understand that a car is essentially a 2 - 3 thousand pound missile just waiting to go off. I know I didn’t. I thought I was invincible. But the adults in the comments section have apparently always been sensible, and well mostly judgmental and yes, it pisses me off.

So I stopped reading those comments and checked on the status of our young friend who is still in the hospital and sat down to write, mostly because it helps me collect my thoughts and find calm.

There were mistakes made in judgment. There was at least one child who will have to live with the consequences of his actions for the rest of his life. There was the  tragic loss of a young father, only 31 and there was once again, the unfair, unexplainable, and seemingly random happening that makes us ask “why?”

Nobody really has any good answers. All we can do is make this a lesson, and remind ourselves that each second, each minute, each hour, every day, and every year is not to be taken for granted.

Throw up a prayer, look up, sideways, around, whatever you do to send good mojo and thoughts to the young men involved, to the family of the man whose life is gone, to all involved, and all affected...

That they may find peace. 

Pockets

Recently I decided that I have too many to do lists. Not wanting to just let anything go though I decided that I needed a place to collect everything, kind of a brain dump if you will. This was partly because of my summer of rumination and partly because I had run into a couple of conflicts, particularly with my schedule and I found myself saying: “I need to learn to say no.” When Netter agreed with me, I knew I was onto something.

Before I started saying no however, I thought it would only be fair if I at least tried to keep the commitments and obligations I already have in place.

Wow! What a list I found for myself. A lot of ticky tac stuff, some big projects, some projects whose time had passed - the assessment was formidable.

Just look -

 
No, my handwriting is not worth a lick, but I can at least read my own chicken scratch.

How on earth could I ever even dream about catching up and changing my workflow?

What is it Major Winchester used to say on M.A.S.H. ? (Kinda dated myself there didn’t I?)

I do one thing at a time. I do it very well, and then... I move on.

Um, no that won’t work either... That means some folks have to wait longer than others which might be okay most of the time, but not when you’re already playing catchup.

Okay - I need to designate time. I’m calling that time pockets.

Each category or project will have a pocket. Currently there are 6. This is how I’m lining them up. I have a very big, very important project I have to finish first, but as soon as that is finished - these are my pockets.

1. MJB Foundation work - 2 hours every Tuesday until caught up, then every Tuesday thereafter as necessary - at least during down (non-event) times. So, yes this will be very much like regular business hours and if you have something MJB Foundation related you want to discuss, the office opens at 6:30 p.m.

2. Work projects - every Monday - while I’m fresh - could be Network Logix, Library or other career-related activities - anything that moves me forward in the professional realm. I’ve got an awesome family and friends. It’s high time I find my career.

3. Special projects - currently busy with a college football related activity. That comes on Wednesdays until bowl season is up.

4. Writing, blogging prep, (not to be confused with actual blogging which can happen any day.) Social Media maintenance is on Thursdays. Learning to pick my spots better - i.e. I don’t need to sign up for every service and I need to be conscientious about pulling myself off of the platforms I don’t use. Finding time to read and comment on other people’s work and digging my way through hundreds, maybe thousands, (years - yes plural) worth of favorites and must-reads and not letting that all get piled up again are among my other priorities in this area. This medium is very important to me. I think it is worth its own pocket.

5. Fridays and Saturdays are time for family and friends. Time to be social away from the computer screen. If you see me post something on Saturday or Sunday it probably came from my phone. I don’t want to completely miss the conversation on the weekend, but I need to fuel those real-life relationships too.

6. Sundays are time for family and family business.

Now, this doesn’t mean I won’t do other things on those days, but it does mean that I will devote some pocket of time on each of those days to each of those things, and for right now - those are the only things I’m working on on a regular basis. Does that seem fair? Exclusionary? Am I over thinking this?

Hey, a fella has to have a plan.

Doesn’t he?

What do you think? What are your pockets? Do you have a better or different idea?

If A Blog Falls In The Woods...

I know its been pretty quiet around here lately. I think about posting pretty much everyday, but something always gets in the way. Some task I hadn't planned on or things taking longer than they should. Kids need a ride. Mulligan needs something... or Facebook, or Twitter, or well you know the drill - we all have our distractions.

About the only thing I do that doesn't seem like a distraction is spend time with my wife and kids.

Although they told me I can't sing along with Glee so there's at least some time we might lose together.

I've recently put a name to my dilemma, my issue of getting caught up in "stuff," and not creating, not doing I've been reading Seth Godin's blog a lot lately and I feel like this recent post provides a pretty good summary of how I operate on a daily basis.

While Seth is talking mostly about new media and electronic communication though I think this is how I've worked since, well pretty much since I can remember. (Without deadlines especially), I've always been easily distracted. You know... kinda like this guy.



If you can't see the video click here.

I've talked before about needing deadlines and it seems like lately that has been true more than ever. Recently I ran across an article on Mashable that I think will help me find a way to get more accomplished, not just with social media and electronic communication, but with everything. I hope.

Then again, I've talked about and asked folks about systems and ways for getting things accomplished and not feeling overwhelmed by to do lists.

I'm really just trying to find a way to get rid of this guy. I'm kind of tired of him, and he's pissing me off.

Would it be too much to ask if I asked you to send me some good mojo to help me send him packing?

Thanks!

Please feel free to share any of your ideas for getting things done, making progress, being creative and productive and well you get the picture...

Easter -

I'm always anxious in the springtime. Tired of the winter doldrums, of the gloom and gray.
Eager for the sunshine and the warmth that is to come.

I've never been a winter person. In my not always so humble opinion, there is one good thing about winter and we've learned how to make ice indoors which is where hockey should be played anyway.

In Central Ohio it seems we tend to hang onto winter a little longer for some reason, I think it's our local weather folk. They really like the swings in temperature - you know 30 one day, 70 the next.

It is a funny thing when you think about it. I remember one Easter morning Netter and I got the twins all dressed up in their pretty little dresses with a sweater for the light breeze that was blowing, and off to church we went.

One and one half hours later, it was snowing and Grandpa was none too happy that his granddaughters did not have coats. Yikes! Fortunately it was just a short walk to the car, and we quickly rushed home for warmer clothes for all of us.

But while it snowed that Easter Sunday, I have always found Easter to be the day that gives this sun starved individual a little hope, a little drive towards summer.

There are of course, the religious meanings of the day, the story of our Lord's rising from the Dead is, and should be our central focus. Still, as someone who believes you don't necessarily have to go to church to be religious I tend to focus on the more "modern day," applications sometimes - i.e. the rebirth that is spring.

As a golfer the spring time is one of my favorite times of year. I'm reminded of a piece I wrote sometime ago. I blogged about it in the fall, but I'd like to post it again today so I can remember, so I can, well so I can be spiritual.

(Plus, I must confess it's one of my favorite pieces and I like to get those out and dust them off every once in a while.)

Early in the morning at the golf course, usually on the first long par 5 and particularly on courses which are more natural than man-made, i.e. wetlands have been preserved, animals are still in abundance, there is a fine mist that gives me an incredibly peaceful feeling. I’m playing my favorite game. I’m out in nature. I’m enjoying the company of friends and companions. It’s hard to explain it briefly but trust me it’s awe-inspiring. To get a sense for it, go outside some morning early in your barefeet (when it’s warmer), walk in the dew-covered grass, take big gulpfuls of air and try and think of something or do something you really enjoy (like drinking a fresh cup of coffee). Try and take notice of everything outside - the sky, the clouds, the birds, the ants on your driveway. Now look up.

Way up.

Get it?

The Questionnaire

Well it has been some kinda 10 days or so. I've been fighting a cold that, well that just about won the battle it seemed at times. Coupling my allergy issues with this past Thursday's stormfront I was in bed that day until after 4:00 p.m. Even for me, that is well past sleeping in.

I'm still working on posts about the yellow highlighter shirt, the guru tag, and as always, I have a few other thoughts and ideas so please do stay tuned for those.

Today though - Well today, I'm going to riff off my Twitter colleague Tim Scott , and answer 10 questions I've always wanted to answer.

For the record, I love Inside the Actor's Studio. I think James Lipton asks remarkably insightful questions of some of the greatest stars of theatre and screen. The show is always informative, often revealing and usually quite moving.

I've often thought about how I might answer the list of questions asked of each guest toward the end of the show. They were originated, and / or inspired by French television personality Bernard Pivot.

So since the Oscars are on as I type this - why not put on my actor hat, and give it a try. I'm not tagging anybody for this meme of sorts, but I would love to read your answers should you decide to tackle the exercise. Please give me a heads up if you do.

Okay - here goes...

1. What is your favorite word?

Ponder. As a WOTD provider my list of favorite words is very long. Still this is my very favorite, both because as the Good Lord knows I've done enough of it in my day, and also because my oldest daughter and I have a running gag with this word. For you K. PONDAH!!!!!!!!!

2. What is your least favorite word?

Turd. Jerk runs a close second, but the word turd just sounds vile and disgusting and for me sounds even worse than that which it is supposed to describe.

3. What turns you on?

Heh, heh, How would I answer this? Okay seriously...Passion. I love people who care. No matter what it is, no matter what you do, if you are passionate about it, I respect that and you.

4. What turns you off?

Entitlement. You respect your elders because they are your elders. You do what you're told when you're told because you were told. You earn the right to make decisions for yourself and you earn the respect of others. Nothing is yours just because you think it should be. If you're not willing to earn it for yourself; unless I'm getting paid - I don't have time for you.

5. What is your favorite curse word?

What me? I don't swear. Well okay, yeah I FUCK(ing) do. This word works well in so many situations. It is always an attention getter. There have been times when I said this word and actually made myself pause and reconsider my actions. For someone who works on impulse and wears their heart on their sleeve like I do, having anything make me pause - especially a powerful word I said myself... Well it's kinda remarkable. I owe a lot to the word Fuck. That said -

Kids, swearing is bad. Say dang, or peanut butter or something more constructive.

6. What sound or noise do you love?

All my Lady's Laughing. Listening to the women in my house laugh, guffaw, giggle, and in general crack-up makes me smile my widest smile. As Tim says in his post, if I caused the laughter, even doing something ridiculous and /or embarrassing myself - well then all the better.

7. What sound or noise do you hate?

Children crying, especially if their parents are inattentive. No matter the time, no matter the reason, I think there is almost always something a parent can do to help to calm or quiet a crying child.

8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?

Writer. There's actually a number of answers for me to this question because I'm very often not sure what my current profession in and of itself entails. But, I'm already a teacher in one sense, and I've done my share of coaching and training, so I'd have to say writer. I'd like to have taken more time to hone that craft and really tried to make a living doing something I love. All that being said - if the Red Wings or Blue Jackets call I'll have my skates on in a heartbeat.

9. What profession would you not like to attempt?

Social Worker. I cannot imagine any job being more thankless, more hopeless, and lower paying than this. True, there are success stories, but it seems like they are all too often few and far between. That kind of defeat on a daily basis just isn't for me. Don't get me wrong, I admire the hell out of those folks. I just don't think I could do what they do.

10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

Michael J. Fox had the best answer to this question I've ever heard. I'm paraphrasing, but essentially he said: "I hope God says Welcome, your Dad's waiting for you with a beer at the bar. There's a hockey game on, and he'd love to talk to you." My Dad is still with us, so I guess my answer goes something like this.

I hope God says: "Welcome Jimmer. You've done the best you could, and made a difference. I am proud. There's a game, (any game) on the t.v. and an ice cold beer on the bar. Your family and friends who have preceded you through those gates can't wait to see you and welcome you home."

Friday Features - Comments

A friend told me a few weeks ago that he follows my blog and he follows my resume tips.

Resume tips? Huh?

"You know, that video about exporting your resume," he said.

Ah, that video - necessary information passed along quick and dirty with emphasis on dirty - that video is a mess. In fact, it has been redone and will come out with other CML Job Help Center Info. Additionally that video is pretty software specific - and no I'm not posting it on my blog.

Still, my friend got me thinking - I've been looking for more of a focus for my blog -or- Do I need another blog specifically for jobs and resumes I wondered?

I started asking folks who might know or have an opinion and the general consensus for a number of reasons is "No." An additional blog is not necessary or necessarily a good idea at this time.

Hmmm... Well, I still sometimes you know have more than just a story to share, and there are some subjects of interest to job hunting or coaching or teaching that I'd like to post on.

What to do? I mulled it over for a few days and decided that I would incorporate something new into my blog. A series of tips, tricks, shortcuts, advice or whatever you'd like to call it that I want to share.

After all - It is all about me right? (Kidding)

In reality this part of my blog will be all about you - I'm calling it my Friday Feature. Why Friday Feature you might ask? Well it's Friday and this is the first in the series so there you go.

(Note: Not all Friday Features will come out on Friday, but all Friday Features will be called Friday Features.)

In today's Friday Feature I want to talk about COMMENTS, or to be more specific the importance of comments as feedback which is so integral to not only our growth and learning as individuals, but also in many cases - one's self-esteem.

I'm not suggesting that anybody is responsible for somebody else's self esteem, but I think it's fair to note that feedback certainly has an affect on that aspect of our personality.

Now reading blogs isn't about coaching, but it is about the give and take of feedback or commenting.

As Chris Brogan writes:

"It’s hard to keep writing when you feel like no one’s watching, or that they’re not engaged."

As a coach, as a leader I have found that the best way to get results, the best way to enhance improvement, the best way to get more of what you like to see your players do is to give them feedback.

And - sometimes I've found that if I didn't give that feedback that's exactly what I got in return. i.e. Nothing for nothing.

I've had a few posts of my own that I labored over for hours and I knew folks were reading because I have that little feedjit traffic feed at the bottom of my blog. What I didn't know was what people thought. I admit at first that bugged me quite a bit.

"Wow!" I thought. "Do I suck that bad?" (If you know me you know there was some serious smoke coming from my head.)

But then I had some posts that generated a lot of feedback.

"Cool!" I thought, "I must be the greatest writer ever." Not really, but I was obviously much happier, more confident.

Then I finally got it. I joined the community at NHL Connect, The National Hockey League's online fan site. I have some friends there who blog about hockey and I was always reading their blogs and watching the incredible number of comments they had, the give and take, the conversation.

Well I love the conversation. So I joined. Just for kicks I threw up a hockey blog - something I just happened to have on hand. I wasn't there to blog as much as I was there to support my friends, but I didn't want to be the guy with no content and I had the story so there you go...

Of course my Connect friends immediately commented and welcomed me, (Thanks Juice, Jess, Kiki and everyone else) but then something happened that I had never anticipated.

The next day, (and still today so they must not update very much) I got blog of the day. It's true. You can see it here. One paragraph, but enough emotion for 10,000 words. Or if the link is broken I do have a picture. (I couldn't figure out a way to show the link's progression.)

Of course I was very proud and I posted on Twitter and Facebook and called Annette and the girls and Woo Hoo for me. But how the heck did that happen and why did I feel so darn good about it?

Well it happened because my writing touched somebody, and I felt so darned good about it because that somebody, those somebodies, let me know.

I gave this plenty of thought and I decided a few things.

First, I decided that while it's cool to write to touch somebody it's not always necessary. With that though goes the fact that while you've written for yourself you are just as likely to have to comment for yourself. Not a bad thing if you expect it. So I decided not to put so much pressure on myself if a post turned out to be more about me or for me and I didn't hear very much back from my readers. Still I would have to reconsider it that was what I truly intended.

B, I decided that when I was touched by what someone wrote I would be sure to comment or even - OMG Hold your horses there young man - share that moment - that piece with others.

I know, I know - Hey, women and children first okay.

III. I went out and commented on a lot of the blogs I read regularly, not nearly as many as I would have liked, but a whole lot more than I had been. I even commented on blogs I hadn't read previously and added new friends in the process. (Thanks DrLori)

4th. I tried to share blog posts I had read with my Twitter and Facebook community and tell them why. Here is a good New Year's resolution post. Here is a good Fashion post, and here is a good post on the NHL's Winter Classic.

In every instance of sharing I received a positive comment from someone who had gone to the post from my link or some positive feedback from the writer themself.

The give and take of feedback.

So the next time you go to a blog, maybe even one that you read regularly - before you do a quick read and move on, I would ask you to pause and consider giving at least some feedback to the writer.

A quick "good job," or "I liked this about your post," can go so much further than you may ever consider possible.

If you're a blogger and you don't get a ton of comments or feedback or you're worried about lack of feedback, stop and consider why. But no matter what, with credit to Chris Brogan:

Keep trying. Persist. Try new things. Experiment. Comment elsewhere to build relationships. And don’t give up. Blogging is more fun when there are comments, but your ideas are still just as valuable just being out there.

I'm glad that you share, and I'm glad I get to share with you.

Resolutions

I'm not working tomorrow. In fact, January 2nd is the one day of every year I try not to work. It's too depressing.

Now you might think I say that because it is the end of the holiday season, but that's really not it. Well, my reasons for not working January 2nd have a lot to do with one particular holiday tradition, so maybe it is true. I'll let you be the judge.

Across the land last night hundreds, heck, millions of people watched the clock strike midnight and made their New Year's resolutions.

This means that tomorrow at the library we, (well not me) will see people who are going to exercise more, lose weight, quit smoking, learn about technology, build a resume and get a better job, and on and on and on.

Now, I hope (today's WOTD), that a large number of these folks are successful in their endeavors. The reality though is that a larger number will fail.

In just a few weeks, the treadmills at the gyms will once again be empty, the restaurants will once again be full, and the junk food and tobacco business will once again be booming.

I just think that's depressing.

A few years ago, I decided I wasn't going to do resolutions anymore. I was sick of the failure, of saying things like, "I'll try again in the spring," or "I'll do it for Lent."

Instead I set about finding a way to actually accomplish something instead of revisiting failure.

I began by working on True Intent. As I've talked about before, that goal is to:

Always try to consider peoples' true intent when interacting with them and respond accordingly and without bias.

Now this is an ongoing exercise, so I can't say that it's a "resolution" per se, but I do remind myself each year to stay true to that goal and I take a little inventory to see how I've done during the course of the preceding year.

This year, I think I did okay. I still lost my temper more than a few times, was less than patient in a couple of situations, and probably added some sarcasm that wasn't necessarily called for.

It's always a work in progress.

Today, I am asking myself if there is an end goal from that progress, and while I don't think there is as human interaction will never end, I do think it is part of something larger that I have been working on without even knowing.

That would be the process of self improvement. Yeah, I'm putting it all together now - the Year of Inventory, the desire to get along better with others, wanting more people to know the real me. In general, the need to tackle some things I've been avoiding for years.

Duh, Jim - the process of self improvement. Good for me, but darn I can be slow sometimes.

Okay, so I'm asking myself, "what's next? What do I want to work on improving in 2009?"

Heck I don't know. I've been pondering that question all day long, walking around the house, staring at the t.v. screen, watching football and hockey, looking at my cluttered desk. You know - taking inventory.

I'd like to read more. I'd like to have better sleep habits, and maybe even make myself into a morning person. (Is that possible?) I'd like to refinish a couple pieces of furniture that have been sitting in my garage for far too long. I'd like to finish a few projects at work that have been sitting in my "to do box," for quite a while. I'd like to blog more, and write more effectively.

That's just the list of things I've come up with today. The total number of possibilities are really probably endless. Self improvement is not something that we ever finish or check off a list. Nobody is perfect as they say.

But where to begin? How do I "not fail?"

I have my lovely wife to thank for providing the answer to this question. Netter always says:

"Just do something. As long as you are doing something you are making progress and that's really all that's important."

And so I begin - that pile of clutter won't be there for long.

What's your New Year's resolution?

Three Beautiful Things for Thanksgiving

It's been a pretty trying week as we have wrestled with car repair costs, Christmas budgets, and other various and sundry monetary concerns that may or may not be a subject for a later day, er um, post. (Probably not - who wants to read about money troubles?)

Of course, like many or most - I paused yesterday to take time to think about all that I have to be thankful for.

To share them and to provide a bright spot to the end of our week - I'm borrowing another idea from my friend Cat, (I told you I think she's brilliant) and sharing 3 beautiful things.

1. The four lovely ladies in my life. Showing my bias, but probably not facing much if any argument from many I'm sure - Netter is one of those people who you know from the moment you meet to be a special person in your life. Of course, for me she is the MOST special person, and I am lucky and privileged to have her in my life. I love you Honey.

D and K are brilliant, intelligent, and beautiful growing young ladies. I am very proud of their accomplishments, but even more proud that they are loving, caring and helpful individuals.

Meghan Joy is an inspiration for me and for many. Because of her, and the legacy she provides we have been able to share our gift of Joy with so many children with challenges in the Central Ohio area. I love you Meghan Joy.

I am grateful for the gift God has given me to be a Daddy to all of my daughters. I love you girls.

2. My extended family, especially my in-laws. So often I hear horror stories about grunting and groaning father-in-laws, manipulating mother-in-laws, and crazy sister and / or brother -in laws. I don't have any of that. I have a group of wonderful people who I am happy to call my family. Thanks Atchison clan.

3. My friends. I always thought I had great friends, but over the course of the last year I've discovered that I have many, many friends I may not have even thought of or known about. I am honored to have both old friends and new, and I very much appreciate knowing you are there for me as I hope you know I am there for you.

3a. Mulligan James - My boy is a crazy, energy driven, sometimes willful beast who I love with all my heart and soul because I know he loves me. Everybody should have a puppy dog, (man’s best friend) like Mulligan in their life.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

I hope you enjoyed the day.

One month - Today - I am just thankful

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and I am thankful to be able to share a story about a wonderful day I got to spend with my family, a day I am very thankful for - exactly one month ago today in fact.

I thought a lot about whether I wanted to talk about this one month, what I might say, what I might reflect on. I have been 40 years old for one month today. Would I say or do anything at all?

Well, I've never been good at keeping my mouth shut and I do like to share, so:

To begin, I have the most amazing friends. Upwards of 30 or more showed up at my mini-shindig, celebration at Buffalo Wild Wings the Friday before my birthday, and that many more shared their good wishes with me during the week(s) that followed. It was an incredibly euphoric high that I'm not sure I've yet gotten over. Thank you to again to everybody.

Of course I also have a wonderful family, and we shared a great day on my birthday. Let me tell you about it.

We decided to go to Easton to hang out, do a little window shopping, walk around and use the gift certificate we had for The Cheesecake Factory for my birthday dinner. I don't generally do the "mall scene" anymore as I prefer the reasonable prices of Wal*Mart and The Thrift Store for my shopping needs.

Being a total geek, the first store we headed for at Easton was a no-brainer if ever there was one. The Apple Store called to me, and I spent a 1/2 hour or so wandering around the store checking out the latest and greatest in Macintosh technology.

Despite the fact that the only Mac I still own is about 10 years old, I am still a huge fan. Netter of course knows this, so she spent some time convincing me to buy the iPod she saw me look at more than once - Okay I plugged it in and listened to almost two full songs before leaving to "think about it."

I also stopped into Aeropostale, you know just to look around.

Kailey shopped for jeans.

I bought a sweatshirt with Delaney's approval.

I embarrassed both girls by going into Pink to see what all the fuss was about. Yeah, I get it.

No, not my child.

Then we went to a store called Whetseal, or Wet Seal aka Who the heck thought it was a good idea to sell these kinds of clothes to teenage girls?

Do people really wear these shoes?

Oh, and I propose a new law - teenage girls should wear flats, long skirts, and let's not forget good old fashioned "Granny Panties."

Doesn't a thong create a wedgie by definition? Aren't wedgies supposed to be bad? Who can explain to me why teenage girls have this infatuation with having wedgies?

Whew!

We stopped into a few other stores, grabbed a coffee at Cup O' Joe's, snapped some pictures of this train for my friend Steve then visited Barnes and Noble, the biggest book store I've ever seen.

We finally made it to Cheesecake Factory absolutely exhausted and famished.

We ate as much as we could, and took home more than one doggie bag.

We finished up with a ride home rockin' out to my fav album. It was a great day!

What a lucky guy I am!

Most of you know I did finally buy the iPod, a red Nano. After so many years of listening to talk radio I was amazed at the emotion I felt as each song played in my ears. So many vivid memories, another part of myself I had lost. Who knew?!?

It certainly has been a year of discovery. That's for sure.

Where to next?

I have to admit I don't know. The uncertain economy has all of us a little on edge, some more than others. I know I am looking at our Christmas budget, and 2009 numbers and probably inciting a little bit of panic at my house.

Sorry ladies, it's just how Daddy gets sometimes.

Still, as I've written before there is so much I still feel I'm gonna, or at least wanna do, so many places I wanna go, so many things I know my family would like, things I would like for my family. (No, I'm not just talking about stuff or things.)

I hope that my family knows this, but I have to admit to the reader that I put it in print today so that all of my ladies are sure to know I am aware.

Sometimes, as I'm sure many do, I just feel strapped in by the financial day to day.

Here's hoping that while today, tomorrow, and every day we all take the time to be thankful for that which we have, we might continue to be able to move forward, and enjoy what the future may hold.

Blog Scavenger Hunt

I've been sharing quite a bit lately about how blogging, and reading blogs has changed my life over the course of the last year, and with that in mind I thought I would have a go at another meme from my friend Cat. (That doesn't count - see the rules below.)

The blog it seems has taken over my household so I don't think I'm going to find blogs that are from people who live closer to me than Netter, or K, who forgot her password for the blog, or D, who doesn't get the whole blog thing, but then again doesn't get a lot of things as she is at the "I don't know" stage in her young life.

I follow my online friend Juice's many blogs. She blogs at NHL Connect, the Freep, and also here. I "met" Juice during the Red Wing's live game blog watching the Wings win the Stanley Cup last spring "with" a bunch of fans from around the country. I almost got to actually meet her this fall as many of us were scheduled to hook up in the D for a celebratory beer, but the events of the summer, i.e. the $4,000 appendix, which also ate into my PTO balance, and two aging vehicles prevented Annette and I from making the trip.

While I only know Juice through hockey and the Wings, her writing is just awesome. She has an insanely funny imagination, and she is incredibly intelligent. I just know having a chance to sit down and chat with her in person would be an experience of a lifetime.

Whaddya' say Juice? Next fall in the D? Celebrating back to back cups? Netter and I are in. :-)

The job I used to have or wanna have is a job I didn't even know existed until a short time ago. I've joked about it quite a bit lately, and I don't know how I could reconcile this with the fact that I really don't want to leave the library, or travel a lot but the job I wanna have belongs to Chris Brogan. Read Chris' bio here.

I think once upon a time a long time ago, I was ahead of the curve, on the cutting edge, ready to make a difference, heck people even listened to me. I just got stuck somewhere along the way. Okay - whew - enough of that.

Be on notice world. I'm fighting my way back. ;-)

My friend Cat wrote a post called 3 beautiful things about the first snow of the season. It made me reconsider my view of snowfall and winter, and while it's still not my favorite season I do have to admit there are some things about winter that I do like - snowflakes, sledding, big fuzzy sweaters or sweatshirts, warm fires, (They smell different than summer fire pits.), hockey season (of course), and the quiet solitude of the evening when the ground is covered with snow, just after it has gotten dark and everyone has gone inside.

Of course, I also was smitten, (yes I just said smitten) with the idea of writing about 3 beautiful things. Bad day? Pick 3 beautiful things. Bad week? Pick 3 beautiful things. Bad mood, karma,mojo , feeling depressed, sad, angry - anything - Just pick 3 beautiful things, stress the positive and see where that takes you. Thanks Cat.

When I tried to think of one blog that made me laugh so hard folks wanted to know what was going on there were quite a few possibilities, but one stood out. I'll post it here with the warning that it might be something in context, it's not the most politically correct, and the author didn't even remember writing it, it was so long ago. All that said - here you go. YMMV.

Cat would have been a really good choice for a blog from someone I've known for a long time, but haven't hung out with in a long time. But I know I need to use a different blog for each answer --Hmmm...

Well, if you don't follow Cat's blog - I suggest you do. She is a fascinating individual. Another fascinating individual who I see every so often, but don't get to hang out with often is my friend Lynne. I love to read stories about Lynne's daughter Erica, and her family. Warning - bring tissues. These are some pretty heartwarming stories.

I was inspired to blog from all of the blogs I followed last summer, but the two most influential belong to my friends Kelly and Christa who share stories about what is going on with their families, with a touch of humor, and a solid take on the important things. Of course, I could say that about a number of blogs I follow, but da rulez say I can only use each one once.

Julie is the one person I never thought would be blogging. I'm really glad I was wrong. As I told her in a comment to her first entry - "I'm looking forward to reading. Don't think of this as 'just a journal.' Think of it as a place to share all those cool witty observations you are always making in real life. You got this - trust me." Julie is one of the smartest, funniest, people I know. I'm glad I have the privilege of calling her my friend, and reading her blog.

I'm sure I could point you to a lot of articles, or posts or sites that I think could change the library world. Some of them you probably have read yourself. I'm gonna go outside the box a little bit on this one and show you a blog post that shows the library world is already changing. Check this out.

Alright - the final thing, numero diez.

My friend Mo writes a blog that makes me feel good every time I read it. It's not that I agree with everything Mo writes, although I mostly do, or that she makes me laugh, although she usually does. The thing is; following Mo's blog I can tell that she puts a lot of thought into what she writes. She doesn't post every day or even as regularly as her fans might like. (hint, hint) But when Mo does post it's usually something that has really struck her and I think that's cool.

There you have it. This was probably the hardest meme I've run into yet, but it was a great exercise to consider who, what, where, when and why.

Of course, there are blogs I follow that I didn't mention here today. For example, my friend Gregor who has been a big part of my journey and has just started blogging again himself. This doesn't mean I don't have props for everybody. It just means you all write too darn much good stuff.

Want to play along?

Da Rulz:

1. Use a different blog to answer each question.
2. Be sure to include hot links in your answers, and if you're referencing a specific post, be sure you're linking to the permalink for that post (not just the general blog addy).
   
3. Not every linked blog needs to be a Library person or a L&P participant.
4. If you do this meme, please come back here and give me a link so I can read it!
   

Da Thingz to find:

1. A blog written by someone who lives close to you physically.
2. A blog you read written by someone you've never met, but would like to.
3. A blog written by someone who has the job you used to have, or the job you wanna have someday.
4. A blog entry that made you think about something a new way.
5. A blog entry that made you laugh so hard your co-workers and/or family asked to know what was going on.
6. A blog from someone you've known a long time but haven't hung out with in a long time.
7. A blog or post that inspired you to start blogging (or just written by the person who got you going).
8. A blog from someone you never thought would be blogging.
9. An article/post/site that you think could change the library world.
10. A blog you've found that makes you feel great every time you read it.

Whole New Rodeo Dog - Thing #23.

Alright Gang - I'm going to try to do this one with a little structure, but include some story too.

I'll try to use the suggested questions as a framework.

What were your favorite discoveries or exercises on this learning journey?

There are two answers here: Obviously my favorite and still continued exercise is Twitter.

My favorite discovery has actually been rediscovering my love of writing through my blog. I am so grateful for this. In short it has been therapeutic and life-changing. In the last few months I can even tell when I haven't been blogging as much as I need to as I felt my anxiety level rising.

The blog allows me to remind myself to be Jimmer, i.e. the real me. I've tried to be sure not to make Jimmer a character, to not talk about myself in the third person, except for maybe when it was appropriate for a piece. This is not a character by any stretch. This is Jim Brochowski about as exposed and open as I've ever been, reaching out, reflecting, trying to give myself another chance by simply being myself.

Two recent examples make me think I'm on the right track.

The first is a situation wherein I was pretty much asked to prove that this wasn't all just lip-service. I believe the reviewer is convinced.

The second is a comment from a friend at CML. She told me I could quote her.

Jim-
I have loved following you on Twitter. Like I said in a recent tweet, your willingness to self reflect and share that process has been heartwarming. As we all reveal a part of ourselves through social networking, new relationships are being created and others are being rekindled. It is so cool to watch it and experience it. Of course my follow-up tweet said this, “Now you have become more than just the guy who drinks coffee all day.” I’m sure you understood why I said this. The only time you and I had ever had any interaction is when you passed by the Greeter Desk on the way to the Java Master, coffee cup in hand. We are communicating on a whole different level now, and I think it is great. Looking forward to the continuing conversation…..

That means a lot more than I think I can verbalize. Thank you Type A Librarian.

How has this program assisted or affected your lifelong learning goals?

My lifelong learning goals all relate back to 3 things. Three discoveries I've made about myself in the last few months / years. These are my base.

Because the 23 Things for me has been so much more than just Learn & Play, I think it is obvious that this program has been more than just those things. It has provided an avenue to learning, a way to reconnect and show people who the real Jimmer is.

So, what are the three things you ask?

The first thing - a customer came into the library to print something out. He had no idea whatsoever what he was doing so what he ended up doing was taking it out on our staff. Cussing up a storm, swinging his arms, banging the equipment and not getting what he needed in the process.

I don't know how or why, but something struck me. I was never more calm as I said to him - "It's okay. What do you need?" Looking puzzled he stared at me and said "Huh?" I repeated what I had said and he told me what he wanted. Together, we accomplished his task in a little less than five minutes. That was weird I thought, but I didn't really understand the magnitude of the situation until I received a copy of a note / "say it" the customer had left commending me for being helpful while he was "irate."

Reflecting on this I realized that what I had done was recognize that this man's true intent was not to create a disturbance. He simply needed to accomplish something he had no idea how to accomplish. Huh?

True intent.

I began to think long and hard about how I was interacting with people. Was I recognizing what their true intent was when they came to me with a question for example? Was my Mother's true intent really to frustrate me every time she visited?

Wait - My Mother - Oh the poor woman. I really needed to work on this when interacting with her.

So, I set two goals for myself, and made them my New Year's resolution and Lenten promise until the end of time. 1. Be nice to my mother and do everything in my power to make her feel welcome in my home. 2. Always try to consider peoples' true intent when interacting with them and respond accordingly and without bias.

Note: As far as I can tell - True Intent in this context is my own thing. I don't think there's any great concept out there. Hmmm... Maybe I should write a book or something. "True Intent" copyright 2008 Jim Brochowski ;-)

The second thing - When I tell the story of Meghan Joy I always include the following quote:

"From Meghan and because of Meghan we learned to attack each day with enthusiasm. We learned to reach out and make things happen for us instead of waiting for them to happen to us. We learned to face each new challenge head on, with our entire being. We now know the value of living and giving a total effort. Many years ago I lost my daughter. As I look back on her story and what effect it has had on our lives I see that I’ve tried to live my life from that point exactly as I’d promised Meghan I would. I guess it sounds like a cliché, but life is short."

It's almost like a prepared text pulled from the pages of her story, but when I saw it in print at our golf tournament this year it was abundantly clear that I was not keeping my promise. I began to do some deep soul-searching, looking at the man in the mirror as they say and trying to find better ways to change.

The third and final thing. This one I owe to Randy Pausch. In his final lecture he talked about, among other things being a Tigger or being an Eeyore, i.e. an optimist or a pessimist. He also talked about how he had lived his life, doing things for his kids, and his wife. It is an incredible lecture. If you haven't watched it I assure you it is an investment of your time you will not regret. He also wrote a book titled "The Last Lecture" which I highly recommend.

I really admired Randy's viewpoint, but I didn't know how valuable it would be to me personally until my daughter Delaney started school this year. Delaney was a worrier, the "what if" person if you will and I was having a hard time convincing her that it would be good to go into school with a positive attitude, charging ahead, being a leader and so on. But she wasn't getting it. Finally, I looked at Delaney and remembering Randy's lecture I said; "Are you Eeyore? Or are you Tigger?" Instantly her eyes lit up. She got it. She really got it, and she now tries to be a Tigger in every way.

Having had this talk with my daughter I knew I needed to ask myself the same question. Jim, are you a Tigger or are you an Eeyore? Yes, I needed to change my answer too.

These three things are my base. I try to check myself regularly on these, and I encourage you to check me as well. Go on. I'll listen. ;-)

Were there any take-aways or unexpected outcomes from this program that surprised you?

I have been pleasantly surprised by the sense of community that has been created at CML. This exists throughout the Web 2.0 community. I have been able to reconnect with my colleagues at the library in several locations, and I have made new connections via Facebook, and by following the "rock stars" blogs.

I think my new career goal might be to be one of those rock stars. Look out Michael Stephens. Kidding ;-)

Seriously, this program has provided me a way to reflect by moving forward. For that I will always be grateful.

What could we do differently to improve upon this program’s format or concept?

My old self would have said something really badass, like: "Don't you dare change a thing about this program." But that's not me anymore.

I think what I would say now is don't ever forget the term "Perpetual Beta." Please always be willing to consider the next idea, the next thing and embrace them. Try them even if they don't initially seem to be so great, even if they require radical trust, even if the benefits aren't immediately obvious.

I believe there are so many organizations, companies, and even industries that are being held up by their reluctance to change and adapt, to try new things even.

I think my biggest pet peeve right now is people who say; "I don't have time for all that Web 2.0 stuff, that new fangled techno stuff and so on. I've got real work to do." I wonder if they have ever considered how much more work they could get done if they would get on board and let that new fangled techno stuff work for them.

I'm trying to bring Web 2.0 technologies to my foundation with a new board later this month. I am very hopeful they will agree with me on this. I think The MJB Foundation can accomplish so much. Please wish us luck.

Oh and consider this your formal invitation to follow The MJB Foundation on Twitter. (Updates should become more frequent soon.)

If we offered another discovery program like this in the future, would you again choose to participate?

This one is simple and requires only a few words - in a heartbeat.

One more you didn't ask:

What has been the coolest thing about this program?

As a teacher, trainer, and a coach the coolest thing for me are the "Aha moments," when you can see folks really get it, When they are really connecting and helping themselves succeed. When they are engaged. I've been fortunate enough to see more than my fair share of these over the years and Learn & Play provided that many more. My favorite saying in these instances is "this ain't my first rodeo dog."

Of course this rodeo has been quite a bit different.

Learn & Play @ CML Thing #22 MOLDI

Yes, that says MOLDI - as the Learn & Play blog says "yeah, I know, horrible acronym, but great service."

It is a great service, but I have to admit to having at least some reservations.

Finding material is easy enough - search features are very simple with several ways to search for different types of material.

Checking out, as it were is also very easy. Simply following instructions and looking for some intuitive cue words like "add to cart" I found it to be very much like online shopping.

The rest of the process is also easy enough - You "checkout" your ematerial. It's downloaded to your computer or portable media player, as is the “reader software,” if needed, and cha - ching you are on your way.

Cool, I thought - now how does it get returned? Or more accurately, if I'm an author and I want to keep my copyrighted material mine - how can I do that?

I know it's the digital age and everything is available to everybody, but as a creative type I wonder about such things.

I did some quick digging on MOLDI and then took this question to my Twitter community. "After 14 days, do items delete themselves or is it " a trust thing?" I can't find an answer." I know, I probably would have found an answer eventually, but I find the layout of most FAQ pages to be cludgy. I also think FAQ's with perspective are much more fun.

The answer seems to be as follows "They delete themselves from your computer, but if you burned them to disc nothing happens," as in they can be played "...forever and ever."

So, I asked my friend CychoLibrarian who knows about such things if that bothered anybody?

His reply - Well, it was perfect.

"It doesn't bother me, but only because the publishing industry is clueless about how to handle the digital age."

See - call me old fashioned, but when I create something I want to keep it. I like to share it, but it is still ultimately "mine." Take my writing for example - If you follow this blog with any regularity you know that this is very personal for me. I would like to think that if I had something worth distributing to the masses I would feel the same. It's very personal.

Still I can't find fault with my friend's viewpoint. The publishing industry really is clueless in this instance - so what do we do?

Well, the only thing left really is a term I learned about not long ago - radical trust - I may be bending it a little to fit my purposes here, but to me putting creative work out in this medium requires quite a bit of "letting go of control..."

So, for our purposes today - what do I think of MOLDI? I think it's a great way to take the library to the community and provide a virtual presence. I found many titles I would check out - AND return.

Let's hope more folks do the same.

*edit - I want to also give credit to my friend KKBookmom for pointing me to the actual MOLDI FAQ's.

Nature in a Bottle - Flashback piece 1

Finishing up the last of the Mac to PC migration (again, it's cheaper) I am finding some old files I had forgotten existed. Some are pieces I'd written in "the way back" that I would have shared then given this forum.

I hope you like them.

As part of a newsletter project for staff at the Hilltop Branch we were asked each month to answer some thought-provoking question.

My favorite follows -

If you could bottle something in nature to sell or enjoy at a later time, what would you choose and why?

Early in the morning at the golf course, usually on the first long par 5 and particularly on courses which are more natural than man-made, i.e. wetlands have been preserved, animals are still in abundance, there is a fine mist that gives me an incredibly peaceful feeling. I’m playing my favorite game. I’m out in nature. I’m enjoying the company of friends and companions. It’s hard to explain it briefly but trust me it’s awe-inspiring. To get a sense for it, go outside some morning early in your barefeet (when it’s warmer), walk in the dew-covered grass, take big gulpfuls of air and try and think of something or do something you really enjoy (like drinking a fresh cup of coffee). Try and take notice of everything outside - the sky, the clouds, the birds, the ants on your driveway. Now look up. Way up. Get it?

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